u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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