Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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