It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
the liver wants what the liver wants
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
