it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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