Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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