the new term for farting is butt boxing.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
