Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
