we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
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