In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
