the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
