Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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