Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize