I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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