he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize