Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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