Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I am available for nakedness
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize