i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize