Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
should my penis look like a turkey
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
