The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
