Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize