it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
