I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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