Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
