but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
