I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
