You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
