how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I haven't been this sober since birth.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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