Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
