I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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