like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize