After last night, I could never be a politician.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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