No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
