its not stalking. its research.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize