I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Swine flu is the new snow day.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
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