i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Your penis caused this!
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