wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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