Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
her facebook's as public as her vagina
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize