Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
You're like the curious george of whores
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
