So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
oh god the rape fog is back!
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
