just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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