i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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