i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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