everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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