no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
