That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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