hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
