Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
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