awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Randomize
