im about as happy as oj after his trial
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize