Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
