Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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